Now That I’m a River

In which a snake sheds its skin and becomes a river.

Now That I’m a River is an interdisciplinary work that reflects on the process of a snake shedding its skin to explore various states of personal transformation. This shedding is rooted in the ritual and tradition of Carnival in Trinidad & Tobago: a cyclical, transformative period that coincides with a relaxing of colonial regulations on what women’s bodies can look like and where we can take up space. Despite having a culture that profits off of marketing sexuality and freedom during the Carnival season, Trinidad is surprisingly conservative. Rules often require women to cover their shoulders and knees to enter public spaces and to access government services. In the midst of these colonised requirements for our bodies, women are exposed to violence and assault throughout the year and are often slut-shamed and victim-blamed in the aftermath. Once a year, for two days, the roads are blocked and people flood into the streets of the city of Port of Spain, moving through them like water, dressed in costumes, bikinis or nothing at all. In a country where one in three women have experienced gender-based violence, to be able to move so freely in public and to feel safe is an incredibly empowering experience.

Now That I’m a River draws inspiration from the Orisha, kundalini mythology, Jungian dream theory and Trinidad’s folklore character Mama D’leau, a protector and healer of the river who is often depicted as part woman, part snake. This interdisciplinary work is centred around a snake that sheds its skin and becomes a river: a metaphor for the cyclical process of celebrating femme sexuality during Carnival and violently suppressing it throughout the year.

Developed during my residency at Alice Yard, this work uses performance, writing, video, photography and drawing to engage in a process of character building and myth-making. The 3:33 minute-long, looped film includes drumming by a member of Trinidad’s Ifa community and sound bowls and chimes that resonate with the sacral chakra. I was particularly interested in the ways that dances like wining and twerking activate this chakra and function as a portal to awakening and embodying our creative and sexual energies. The ‘mas’ or costume that is worn for the performance film was handmade using twine, rope, leaves, beads, and snakeskin printed fabric. Notes, photography, documentation and drawings are shown alongside the film. In Now That I’m a River, Carnival functions as a ritualised rebellion, as a reclamation of our agency, and as a gateway to a liberated, integrated self.

Like every other living creature,

my body knows when it’s time.

I cannot hide, 

I am my own witness.

Surely, It is an act of love: 

To look at what I once was, 

and to know that I must let it go.

Unbound, I am exposed.

Raw flesh tumbling out.

Anew, again.

Credits

Produced, Co-Directed, Edited & Performed by Gesiye

Co-Director & Cinematographer: Shari Petti

Photographer: Olajuwon Scott

Camera Assistant: Jonathan Gift

Colour Grader: Mawasi Charles

Studio: Pomegranate Studios

Drummer: Sheena ‘Ajibola’ Richardson

Sound Bath: Isabel Gomez Burke

Sound Designer: Mikhail Gibbings

Production Manager: Kamron Waithe

Production Assistant: Tracy Assing

Production Assistant: Timiebi Souza-Okpofabri

Collaborating Costume Designer: Kristian Jaggesar

Technical Support: Kriston Chen, Christopher Cozier

Developed at Alice Yard

Now That I’m a River was shown at Granderson Lab on February 11th 2023; in the group show, Why Now? at Y Art Gallery, Trinidad & Tobago from February 27th 2023 to April 1st 2023; and in the group show, La Trenza - The Braid at WhiteBox in New York City, from October 4th 2023 to November 11th 2023.